Joseph Limbaugh
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Beryllium.

High Modulus of elastic, Calm, unchanging, not spastic.
Neither are you pathetic, not at all magnetic.
You're my Joy. A great Alloy.

CHORUS:
Bertrandite, Glucinum, Beryl and Aquamarine.
Phenacite, Glucinum, Chrysoberyl - Emerald Green.
Wohler and Bussy said they loved you, Vauqelin was so proud of you.
They all thought that you were great.
Back in 1798. Vauqelin was your first date.

Permeable to X-rays makes you alot more sexay.
Thermally conductive makes you more productive.
You're the one. You're so much fun.
Lowest weight for a metal. At high temperatures, you settle.
Unharmed by nitric acid. Exciting, yet placid.
You're so sweet, but I can't eat.

CHORUS
...Back in 1828. They used potassium to isolate.

Gyroscopes and reactors, computer parts and tractors -
Stable and unmelding, circuits, springs and welding
in satalites. We'll talk all night.
Missles, rockets and jet planes. Other things I can't explain.
So many great uses, what about your abuses -
What have you done. Beryllium?

CHORUS
...Nine point oh point two one eight. That is your atomic weight.